blah-ness....

....flustered...some pretty strange things have been goin thru my head lately....all i do is daydream in class...sleep when i get home...then get up and go to work...real productive rite?? lolz...not! so im gonna do somethin..kinda productive...[song playing= love by musiq soulchild]...i remember the first time my dad told me that him and my mom were gettin a divorce...he had left for a little while and then came back and sat me on his lap outside on our porch and told me that he was gonna be leaving for awhile...i didnt really get it...but..yeaaa...i think i was lik 8...i miss my dad...i have a "sperm donor" now...he calls when he wants...didnt show up for my bday...didnt tell me about our family reunion...nothin...he wants a friend...i dnt wanna friend...i need [well..past that...more like want] a father...o well...moving on...[song playing= signs of lovemaking by tyrese]...my sister and i used to climb out the window of her bed room and sit on the roof at lik 2 in the morning and smoke...during the summer of 2006...that was the summer that everything changed...that was when i realized that i really didnt need to start growing up...it didnt actually kick in until some things went down but overall that was the best summer of my life...i got my whole "trouble maker" shit out of my system (even tho needless to say i have never been a trouble maker)...i remember like the back of my hand all the other songs that were on the cd that i burned "signs of love making" on...[song playing= lets stay home tonite by joe]...wooooooow...memories...thats really i have to say about that...its amazing how soo many things can change and u never really notice it until its months or years down the road....el fin.